The official list of malarkey

  • There are no July Fourth parade officials or judges. However, there is definitely — no kidding — a July Fourth parade in Darwin.

  • The section about past July Fourth parade training is fictitious; the illustrations are not from a book about July Fourth parades in Darwin.

  • Contest mixups did not result in Lyle Beaver and Edgar Poon missing trips to Darwin. There is no Lyle Beaver nor Edgar Poon, and there was no contest to win a Darwin trip.

  • The story about the Darwin Falls arms race on the Darwin Falls page is not balderdash. All facts as presented are true, to the best of my recollection.

  • The news story about the X-mas intaglio on Panamint Dry Lake on the Panamint Valley page is utter hokum, although the intaglio itself does exist.

  • A small nuclear blast was never used to break through the caliche layer to percolating soil.

  • Midgets did not play a major role in the construction of Scotty's Castle. The little doghouse-sized structures were used to house hydrants, their hoses and electric junction boxes.

  • Darwin French did not have a brother named Eddie "Stench" French.

  • That is not really Mr. Ed's head in the Panamint Valley photo; it's a burro skull that was found nearby.

  • The speed limit for military aircraft overflying Darwin is not 255 mph.  I have no idea what it is.

  • I have never used Bwana Dusty as a weather-forecasting device in severely inclement weather.

  • Mojave Desert residents really do not use a tire chain bolted to a phone pole as a wind sock. They use a small boat anchor chained to a boulder because phone poles can sometimes blow away.

  • Darwin does not mean "the land without trees" in Lithuanian.

Happy now?

Ze Home Button